Setting the record straight on a personal tragedy

NEWSROOM recently carried a notice about the death of Donna Potuzak after we were informed by her husband Rob of a tragic accident. A garbled incorrect story appeared in Spanish media and was re-circulated by an English language blog.

While Newsroom was aware of the media reports, in consideration for the family, coverage was restricted to an "In Memorium notice https://www.newsroompanama.com/panama/5653-in-memorium.html

Today, with the permission of Rob, we reproduce a letter he sent to the blog, published May 5:

I really don't know how to start without going back to the beginning, and the beginning is July 2, 2010 when I rushed Donna to emergency and she was diagnosed with meningitis which is a bacterial infection of the lining of the brain.
SHE NEVER HAD A STROKE as was stated in the news article. She was in ICU for two weeks and in total was in hospital for 31 days.
When she got out she could not speak one word. She could not read one word, she couldn't add 2 + 2, but she could understand everything that was said to her.
Her brain damage was "aphasia" in english "afascia" in Spanish. It is something that occurs very often in stroke victims as well as victims of severe meningitis. You are trapped in your head, never being able to express your wants or needs while understanding everything that's being said around you. It makes a person kind of crazy.
When she got out of hospital on August 2, 2010 she had a period of about a month or two where she did a lot of crazy things at our apartment building. She would leave the apartment when I wasn't watching her and go up and down the elevator. I would enlist the two cleaning guys in the building (Raphael and Nelson) to help me find her through use of the security cameras in the elevators and other parts of the building. The only involvement of the SECURITY GUARDS was to watch the cameras and let myself or the two cleaners know where she was.
We would find her and I would take her back to the apartment. This period lasted only about one and a half months. It was like having an aged parent with dementia.
During this time she did go out onto the little balcony where the air conditioner compressor sits. She had no fear of heights like some people, she had seen the air conditioner installers work out there. She made a lot noise, because she couldn't speak, but she made no attempt to jump, as people who heard or saw her out here assumed she was about to do. I went to the window that opened on the the little balcony and asked her very nicely to come back in, which after a time she did.
AT NO TIME DID ANY SECURITY PEOPLE CARRY HER IN, OR CARRY HER ANY WHERE ELSE.
One time in the first month or two she locked the door from the inside as I took out the garbage. Because I was so afraid of what she might do behind that locked door (she would not let me back in) I enrolled the [[two cleaners to help me go over the roof in a harness to drop down [to]the the little air conditioner balcony outside our master bedroom, from the top floor a 12 foot drop from the roof.
Nelson insisted as he was much smaller and younger he would go. Raphael and I eased him down on a heavy steel cable and he went in through the window. He came down stairs and opened the door for me. Donna was watching TV.
This period ended as I was able to start teaching her to speak again and with the help of a 2 times a week speech therapist. As she was able to start communicating her apparent dementia staring disappearing. After this you met her a number of times and she talked to you reasonably well.
Everything was fine for quite a well and the in the winter of 2011 / 2012 she started to have serious anxiety problems (no more balcony moments) but she could not sleep. I took her to a psychiatrist and she was on sleeping pills and anti anxiety medication for about five months.
Finally she told me what her problem was. She told she was scared that, as I was eight years older, if something was to happen to me she would be absolutely lost in Panama with her disability. I said OK we sell out here and move back to Canada and go to live with her mother and sister. The next day her anxiety was gone. She slept well no more pills.
The third period in this story started about a month ago. We had sold our penthouse and I was making all the arrangements to move to Canada. Every time I completed something new (airlines, hotels, more airlines in Canada to get from Toronto to Regina, hotels, etc.) she got more anxious and scared.
She kept looking at the weather every day for Regina (terrible winter, seven feet of snow.) She feared her situation was causing me to move to a place that I would hate for the rest of my life.

That brings us up to Thursday, May 2, 2013. At 4:00 am I woke to a banging sound like someone slapping a window. I looked over and Donna was not beside me. As I went down the stairs I saw that she was out on the little air conditioner balcony outside of the laundry room. I talked to her nicely, sweet talked her and she then let me help her in (as long as I did get [not] angry with her, which I didn't).
IF SHE REALLY WANTED TO JUMP SHE WOULD NOT HAVE BANGED ON THE WINDOW TO WAKE ME.
We went back up to bed and went back to sleep. We got up in the morning, had breakfast and had a normal morning. At about eleven I had to go out to do some chores, bank deposits etc. At about 1:00 PM I called and told her I would be home in 15 minutes. This I believe is when she decided to stage another little scene.
When I got home I called out to her but got no answer. I looked in all the rooms and finally found the door to the maid's room (which we use as a pantry) closed and locked.
This door is normally never closed as it is held open with a latch. So I banged on the door until Donna finally answered and I told her to open the door. She did open the door but as I entered she backed away from me. She stepped on a little bench we have against the window (and) hopped up onto the window ledge.
I saw as this was happening in a split second that the window was wide open. As she hopped up on the window ledge she couldn't halt her momentum. She now had her back to the open window, but as her right hand and arm were pretty much useless from the meningitis she was not able to balance herself.
She fell backwards out of the window with only her lower legs showing (like someone on a trapeze). I was able to grab her legs before she fell, but all the rest of her was hanging straight down the side of the building. I pulled and I pulled but she was sweaty and my hands were sweaty and finally she just slipped out of my grip. I watched her fall all the way down, something I will see for the rest of my life.
The maid from the apartment below us looking out her maid's room window saw the whole thing take place. NOBODY INTERVIEWED HER APPARENTLY.
I believe Donna just wanted to sit on that window ledge, in a dangerous place, and have me sweet talk her back down. SHE DID NOT JUMP, SHE FELL BACKWARDS OUT[ [OF]THE WINDOW.
It was a terrible tragedy. But, the story in the press makes it even more of a tragedy talking about her like she was some kind of an insane person bent on killing herself all the time. Her mother and her sister could stumble on the article somehow on the internet. All the talk about attempted suicide was bullshit. There's no such thing as attempted suicide from 29 floors up you either are going to jump or not, so those few times she went on the little balconies were NOT SUICIDE ATTEMPTS. They were her way of saying "I need help with my anxieties and fears."
For the record, her name was: Donna Margaret Potuzak and she was 59 years old and I loved her with all my heart.